How To Handle Conflict on Your Church Staff
What Causes Conflict?
Conflict is something that no leader enjoys but is inevitable when people are together for any length of time. To prove my point, I could simply show you a video of our last family gathering. When conflict arises on your church staff, it seldom goes unnoticed by others. Unresolved conflict can cause church-wide problems and bring all progress to a screeching halt. So, what are some of the things that cause conflict on your church staff? Let’s look at just a few:
- Poor Communication. When lines of communication break down, people often resort to assumptions, assigning blame or misreading intentions. This, in turn, often causes people to either avoid other staff members or at least refuse to cooperate with them. If there is poor communication, not everyone may be aware of direction which means that there is also no buy-in from those people.
- Jealousy and Insecurity. When leadership is jealous or insecure of others on the staff, it’s a lose-lose proposition. If a staff member does well, the insecure leader will often become jealous of their success and ostracize them. This insecurity eventually causes mediocrity on a staff that is afraid of too much success.
- Lack of Global Vision. When your staff becomes more concerned with “their department” than the overall vision of the church, conflict is likely to occur. As each staff member looks out for his or her best interest, they may begin to view other staff members as standing in the way of their department’s progress.
- Lack of Leadership and People Skills. Many pastors and church leaders have excellent skills and training for their respective role, but have not had the leadership and/or people skills development necessary to function as a team. Many pastors, in particular, have never had any experience with leading or even managing employees.
- Majoring on The Minors. Good leadership is all about people. Of course, there are processes and systems in place, but the bottom line is always developing people. When your staff becomes more concerned with politics, process, or systems than people, conflict can arise.
How To Handle Conflict
What can we do to combat these issues that are the causes of conflict in our staff? While we can’t eliminate conflict, we can often minimize it by:
- Open Communication. When working with your staff, be very clear in your communication. At the churches where I’ve been on staff, we had weekly staff meetings. But these meetings were often not enough to keep the lines of communication open. Quite often, between our meetings, another meeting would take place between staff members of which I was unaware. Plans would be made and processes put into place that affected me, but that I was not aware of. Even worse, senior leadership would make decisions about my area(s) of responsibility without getting any input from me. This usually caused a malfunction in ministry and was certainly the cause of conflict! Communication breakdown often happens because of different personalities interacting. Training your staff how to communicate with different personality types can do wonders for diminishing conflict! If you would like to use our assessments for your staff, feel free to purchase and download them. We are also available to conduct coaching for your staff, which includes assessments, team building exercises, and diversity training. Contact us for more information.
- Invest In Leadership Development. We all come from different work, and sometimes even theological backgrounds. These difference can cause conflict if not handled properly. Learning how to deal with people is a valuable skill for anyone in a leadership position. Sadly, our staff is usually not hired for their people skills. We hire Worship Leaders because of their musical background and skills. We hire Youth Pastors because of their ability to relate the gospel to young people. Too often, our staff lacks the necessary people skills to relate well to others. Helping your staff develop their leadership skills will go far in reducing conflict. For Leadership Development ideas or coaching for your staff, contact us.
- Confront The Cause, Not The Symptom. We would like to think that everyone on our staff are nice, Godly, Christian men and women who always exhibit Christian attitudes. Since we are all only too human, that isn’t always the case. When dealing with conflict, deal with it. If you learn that two staff members are not getting along, pull them in a room together and listen to each of their perspectives. Come to a resolution, if possible, and move on. Don’t leave it to the staff members to discuss themselves. Be involved. The longer a conflict is allowed to continue, the less likely it is to be resolved. Address issues as soon as you become aware of them. Be aware that the complaint of a staff member is not always the issue. Try to isolate the cause, not the symptom. For example, an argument over who gets an office space may be more about feeling valued than the office space. Differences about process are often over resistance to change more than the actual process.
In the end, we have to understand that a conflict-free church is not possible. If you are not experiencing conflict, it just means that no one is talking yet. Part of our job as pastors is to be aware of our sheep. That includes our staff. That means that we will occasionally have to tell a staff member “no”. Sometimes it means that we will need to bring attention to attitudes or behaviors that are not in line with our Christian standards. In all cases, we will have to become mediators, referees, and at times coaches. Dealing with conflict on your team is not something that is easy or enjoyable, but is something that every pastor will have to face eventually.
For personality assessments, diversity training, leadership development, team building and conflict resolution training, we are your partner in staff development! Contact us for a free consultation and evaluation to learn how we can help you lead better!
